The All-important 1st Runner-Up

I have a confession to make.

I have been in pageants.

OK…I said it!

I was not in them for the “glamour” (glamour being a relative term), but for the scholarship money. So my focus really was on pageants such as Junior Miss and those that were the preliminaries to Miss America (Miss Elwood, Miss Ball State…hoping to get to Miss Indiana), which had great scholarship pay-outs as prizes.

Some of the “merits” of the pageant circuit, besides the blingy crown (….and don’t you go rolling your eyes…you know you always wanted one…just put the moose on the table, girlfriend!) were friendship, panel interviewing skills, poise, & talent development.

But wait…
There’s more!
The untold merits of the pageant circuit:
Nasty girl-fights (entertainment for those of us who find that kind of behavior utterly ridiculous!), cans of Aqua Net for solidifying the big hair (it was the late 80’s/early 90’s, after all), working with a Pageant Coach, a box of gleaming trophies that you've moved from house to house in adulthood...secretly considering an Oscar-like display on the mantle, dyed-to-match 3-inch heals to go with your one-piece, and spray adhesive to glue the buns of your one-piece down.

I learned some very important lessons from pageant participation.

However, I never was “The Queen”.

I was the all-important first-runner up in the event that the Queen could not fulfill her duties…
…except that never once was she not able to fulfill her duties.

(No pageant queen in history has ever not been able to fulfill her duties, I think. Well, except for Vanessa Williams, but let’s not go there!)

Interestingly, this has kind of been a theme throughout my life, this first-runner up thing.

Over and over I have had instances where I was good, but not good enough. Talented but not talented enough, funny but not funny enough, smart but not smart enough. I can think of countless examples, and many times that I was “just” passed over. For years it almost plagued me. Even today there is month after month where I am a high achiever, but not high enough.

After years of feeling like I am good at lots of things, but not the best at anything I was highly frustrated. Then one day it dawned on me and the first part of that sentence stuck and the last part kind of just faded away.

I am good at lots of things.

No, I am not “the best” at anything. I can think of tons of people that are better at every single aspect of life and all that is in it than I am…how humbling. But God, for some reason, made me at least decent at lots of stuff…how humbling that is, too…that He would allow me those gifts, even if my gifts seem sometimes much less gifted than the next girl’s.

Ya know what? I am not the 1st Runner-up in my husband’s eyes…I am his Queen, stretch marks and all…might not want to be caught dead even in a one-piece though, let alone the dyed-to match heels!

And ya know what else? I am not a 1st Runner-up in God’s eyes. I am His Queen, and so are you. There is room at the throne, His throne, for all of us. He doesn’t have to crown just one of us. There are Crown Jewels enough for all of us, there is Royal Inheritance for all of us. And our reward for following Him? A full-ride to the U of E (University of Eternity)…I’d rather have that kind of “scholarship” anyway!

And so now, so much older and more mature am I, it is OK to not be the Queen in the world’s view because I am the Queen in a way that really matters and so are you.
“Yet what is due me is in the Lord’s hand, and my reward is with my God." Isaiah 49:4
I am a Queen with two kings…my Earthly King, my husband…and my Heavenly King, my God. And I will always have a place of prominence in both of their kingdoms, this is the free gift they both give to me. And God has that free gift to give to you too, if you choose to accept it.

And anyway, my mother was right. She, being ever the spin-doctor, always told me that being a little good at a lot of stuff meant I was well-rounded. I like being well rounded. Besides, being a little good at a lot of stuff means that I can craft my own crown, grow and beautifully arrange my own victory bouquet, design my own gown (though I will have to pay someone else to sew it), write my own song for the talent portion, draw on my knowledge of current events to prep for the interview, do my own hair and make-up, and be nice enough to win Miss Congeniality to boot!

OK, well…gotta run. I heard the downloadable application for the preliminary to Mrs. America is now available on-line…

Question: When in your own life have you felt like the 1st Runner-up, like you just aren’t quite good enough? What has God taught you through that?