Pine Needles and Greens

I couldn’t put my finger on what it was, but I was drawn into the Masters coverage yesterday in a way that I couldn’t explain at the time. Not normally a big fan of golf, I was mesmerized. But by the time Charl Schwartzel was helping Bubba into the iconic Green Jacket, I knew exactly why.

There was something for this first grade teacher to learn from Bubba Watson. What I took away from watching was simple, but might as well have been a flashing neon sign among the magnolias and junipers. Then again, when you’ve been in the desert waiting to be delivered out from Egyptian bondage for what feels like 40 years, you look for signs wherever they can be found.

Bubba is unconventional. If you watched you know why; if you didn’t you can google him and read about all the ways he doesn’t fit the mold. Observing this reminded me that God gives us the skills we need to get to the platform He desires when we seek His will with all we are. God gifted Bubba Watson in extraordinary ways, but Bubba persevered and honed his skills on his own, using every ounce of what God put in him. He followed God’s way, not the world’s way - the conventional way, and now he has a national platform through which to further the work of the Kingdom. Lessons & swing study (connections, the right net-work, perfect résumé, the right experience…) or not, when our time comes to drive it out of the pine needles, God will make sure we get on the green.

As in any pursuit - sports or otherwise, some are heralded, others not as much. Watching Bubba illustrated that in sports and in life it doesn’t matter what the world rewards, how full of trophies (or empty) your mantle has been, how much you’ve been lauded by those who profess to know. The world may give you acclaim, but that is no indication of your real contribution. On the flip side, when God decides to “promote” you, to fully make a way for your legacy, it won’t matter if you can see the green or not, He’ll get you there. The timing of that promotion, though, is up to God.

Past shots have nothing to do with today’s; our previous success (or failure) really doesn’t have a lot of bearing on our future. We need to learn from our mistakes, but with each new round, each new tournament comes new opportunity; and so it is with each new experience in life.

Watching the Masters gave me hope. Watching the Masters made me believe that my Augusta is out there, I just haven’t found it yet.

And so I wait. Wondering. Watching for what God will do next…believing that He’ll deliver me at some point from the desert, through the pine needles, and out onto the green.

Brackets and Wires

Yesterday Max got braces. And he’s mad. He feels awkward, conspicuous, abnormal.

He hasn’t articulated it exactly that way, but I know.

I remember feeling that way myself, at just a little younger than he is now. I remember wanting to recede into the backdrop, to go totally unnoticed for a few years, and not emerge until my “chrysalis” phase was long behind me.

Kids don’t want to hear their parent’s words of wisdom in moments like the car ride home from the orthodontist, but I let my words fill the empty space of the car anyway: I know you didn’t want this, that you were happier yesterday, and that right now you’re mad at us. You’re in physical pain, and you’re worrying about all kinds of things. I also know that in a couple of years you’ll thank us. Because we can see the big picture, we have to do what’s right for your life. I hope you’ll be able to look in the mirror and feel great about what’s taking place even though you don’t like seeing braces. Doing something to address the problem, taking action of some kind signals progress; the amazing thing is that you’ll be able to see the progress as it’s happening if you watch closely. There will be subtle daily changes that will add up to have a compound effect of something huge and beautiful in the end, and it will all be worth it.

As my words echoed through the silence of the car, I wondered how often God thinks those same thoughts about us. We may be irritated or even angry at having to endure something that’s annoying, difficult, or painful. We’re worried and can’t see the big picture. Yet He knows that whatever our brackets and wires may be, they confine us for a greater purpose. At some point, when the process is complete, our attitudes, hearts, minds, souls will have shifted. We will have been moved, and something beautiful will emerge that will have been well worth the pain.

If I Keep Getting Better, Why Does it Keep Getting Harder?

*I Wrote this over two years ago, but didn't post it. Looking back, I feel the same - even stronger - about heeding the call of God, and it's now time to tell the story, even though the ending isn't written. Posts to come about what's happened since I wrote this, enrolled at Butler, have graduated, and the lessons I've learned along the way.

Not long ago in an email regarding an extra-challenging student, I raised the question, “If I keep getting better, why does it keep getting harder?”

Today I figured out the answer.

I just finished reading this outstanding book on the topic of non-linear leadership. In it the author talks about the importance of challenges. Challenges keep leaders stretching and growing. Challenges keep people who want to be extraordinary from growing stagnant. Challenges breathe life into organizations by calling on our deepest reserves of problem solving and creativity.

Challenges, I now realize, are one of the things that fuel my fire and ignite my passion. I’m not sure why I didn’t quite get it in this particular way before since I over-analyze everything including myself, but I didn’t.

Now it’s clear:

I really do need just enough challenge to make me continue to stretch and grow into who I am supposed to be, but not so much that it makes me break.

I get it.

It’s not just my perception – every year it really does get harder even though I keep getting better. And that’s exactly the way God designed it to be so that I would stay. He keeps giving me new challenges on purpose. Challenges designed to develop me in the particular ways He wants me to grow. Challenges that force me to become who I am destined to be.

Five years ago I started a business. I didn’t plan to. Nothing about my doing it made sense. It left a lot of people scratching their heads. I guess I needed a challenge.

Not long into it I was doing well. It was attractive in a way that school wasn’t in that when I met the challenges or exceeded them, as I almost always did, I was well rewarded financially and otherwise. Soon people started asking me why I was still at school. The income was very, very large and some of the very same people who were scratching their heads when I started the business were now scratching their heads because I was still teaching. I had to constantly answer questions about why I was teaching when I could afford to stay home, when I led a big team, when I seemed to live two opposing lives. People couldn’t get it.

To the friends and family (and even strangers) who asked those questions, my answer was always the same: I still feel called to be there and until I feel otherwise called, I’m staying.

And while I did believe that answer was true with all of my heart, some days – on the hard days, I didn’t really even understand it myself even though I believed it.

The fact that I was still teaching defied logic. I just knew in my heart that doing anything other than that would be wrong. But I’ve made some really fantastic decisions based on faith, not logic.

I stayed because something deep inside of me held me there like an anchor to life.

Something kept me at school that was more than new markers and my deep love of office supplies. It was something more than adorable kids who say hilarious things. It was even more than the adrenalin rush of a spontaneous lesson that bubbles up out of no where that is one of the best, most creative and engaging lessons you’ve ever taught, while producing this incredible work that you had no idea your kids had in them.

It was something deep in my soul. The still small voice of God whispering, “You were made for this. When you do this to which you are called, you use every gift that I so carefully placed in you. When you do this you leave the legacy I planned for you in deeply impacting kids’ lives. Doing anything less causes you to rob yourself of your own destiny.”

Probably some people at school viewed my dual life of business and teaching as a sign that I didn’t care anymore, that my loyalty was divided. The truth is that it was crazy that I stayed at all. Because of the business I didn’t need the money. I would’ve come there to teach every single day for free.

Many times destiny defies logic. Its fuel is passion, your very heart and soul, burning to create you into who you were always meant to be anyway.

A few weeks ago something started to stir deep within the core of who I am. That always makes me nervous…it always means something big is about to happen…and it always involves a heck of a lot of work. But that spark started to flicker and one day I woke up with a clear thought in my head and determination in my heart: I want to be a principal.

What if I am supposed to be the first drop – the one that starts the ripple effect that causes an impact so large and powerful that I have yet to imagine it? What if I have been preparing for this very moment for my entire life and I hadn’t even realized it?

I’ll have to give up my business. I’ll have to give up the perks I love that go along with the business. I’ll have to make space and time in my life to go back to college to get that additional license I’ll need, and that means giving up some other activities that I love in order to make room. I have a lot to learn. There’s a lot of growth that still needs to take place in me. There’s a lot I don’t know. A lot.

Part of that makes me sad. Part of it makes me scared. And frankly, part of it makes me sick to my stomach…But mostly I see how the business, as well as every other thing I’ve ever done in the last 40 years, has been the perfect beginning training ground for what’s next.

I don’t expect to be handed anything.

I expect to work my fingers to the bone.

I expect to miss what I’ll have to give up.

I expect the work, the process, the journey to be hard.

I expect to make mistakes and to learn unbelievable leadership and life lessons along the way.

But I also expect myself to live in a way where I heed the call God places on me. Even if it means doing a 180. Even if it means having to let go of some things I love.

And I expect the biggest challenges of my life. Not only do I want them, I’ve learned that I need those challenges in order to thrive.

Bring it on.

Diamonds and Brick Dust

I don’t usually cry about baseball. Last night I did. Will’s team lost in a heartbreaker championship game to a long-time rival, and I despise losing. But that’s not why I cried.

I cried because it’s the end of an era.

For eight years my boys have played baseball on the fields at Shamrock Springs. From Instructional League T-ball, to the 5^th and 6^th grade Majors, Rocks Travel Baseball, and everything in between. And now it’s over.

Those fields hold memories too numerous to count – of hard-fought victories, of agonizing defeat, of wonderful people, of coaches that possibly have a calling other than coaching, and of amazing coaches that have impacted our lives forever.

Those fields hold the promise of tiny boys with huge dreams and untold promise…so small they can barely carry their own bat bags.

And they hold the promise of big boys who don’t smell so good after a game, who might really have the chance for baseball to help pay for college. They also hold the stark reality of boys who love a game more than it loves them – who are blessed with talent, just a talent for something other than baseball.

And those fields hold the promise of unearthing the few young men who have been given an arm or a bat that could have only come from God and no one knew it till they stepped across that white line.

Those fields hold sweet Americana – the crack of the bat, the sounds of cheering, and the smells of hot dogs and sunscreen and brick dust and summer and innocent childhood.

Those fields hold my heart.

Oh, there’ll be more baseball. Hopefully school teams, maybe Noblesville Babe Ruth, and possibly other travel teams. But it will never be the same again. Never again on the fields at Shamrock Springs. Never again through WYSI. Never again with those same precious people.

But I’m grateful for the experience and grateful to the game. I’ve learned so much during our years there - lessons in baseball that translate to lessons in life:

*Shake it off: You’re going to mess up, but in a second there will be another play and a chance to redeem yourself

*Sometimes you’re gonna get a fast ball and other times a curve: Make the best of whatever life throws you

*Stance is everything: At the plate success is about getting your weight back and having proper balance. Success in life is about balance, too.

*Losing stinks: Especially when it is a hard-fought loss, but men of great character are never born out of victory alone. Losing teaches not only character, but also humility, and tenacity, and drive…it shows you what you’re made of. And it makes the wins you do get that much sweeter.

*Composure: Especially on the mound, composure is key. No matter the call, no matter how much the strike zone seems to move in a given game, no matter how much it is not going your way, hold that head up, get those shoulders back, and run onto that field (or stare down that batter as you wind up) like you have total command – even when you don’t feel like you do. Same is true in life.

*Hit hard, run fast, give it all you’ve got, and then come home. Home should always be the place you most want to get back to.

*If the coach says to take, you gotta take, even when you want to swing: Sometimes God is going to get you in a situation where doing the right thing or waiting or taking the lesser path (getting a walk when you wanted to be a power hitter) isn’t what you want to do, but He can see the bigger picture and He knows what’s best. You’re smart to be obedient.

*Communication is everything: From signals to yelling “mine”, the team can’t work if the team isn’t talking.

*Attitude matters: skill is really important, but you can be highly skilled and have a horrible attitude – and you’ll get no where fast.

*Good sportsmanship always wins: You earn my respect when you display good sportsmanship both on and off the field. It always wins…even when you lose.

And so goes life. Both the good and the bad always do end. I know there are more great and fun and wonderful things ahead with my boys. But this? This was extra sweet.

For all that the game is…

For all that it taught us…

For the role it played in shaping my sweet little boys into fine young men…

Baseball will always hold my heart.

A special thanks to Coach McCool, Coach Nicole, and Coach Crupi. Words will never express the blessing you’ve been over the years and the influence you've had.

Great...or Right

Great…or Right...

I’ve been praying a lot about a particular thing over the last several months. It’s something that causes me to need to surrender to God every single day. It’s something that I have no control over, at least not right now. It’s something that is really making me step out in faith on several levels. And it’s something that can easily overwhelm me, cause me worry, doubt, and even dread if I let it.

But prayer always calms me. Focuses me. Gets my head and heart back where it should be.

Yet I’ve realized that I haven’t been saying what I should say to God.

We know that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28), and I refer to this scripture and others like it often. I find that especially when I’m looking toward something that I’m anxious about, it helps to say something like: “God, I am trying hard to hear you and to follow what I believe is your will for me, and I know you have great things for me.”

Great things.

Something about reminding myself that God has great things for me makes me feel better. I know that He does have great things for me, and He does for you, too. His plan for us, as we follow Him and daily seek Him, His word, His will, is not for us to continually dwell in misery. (Romans 8:28, Psalm 37:4, Matt. 11:28, Phil. 4:6, just to cite a few.)

However, the truth is that sometimes we are going to endure something miserable – an event or a season in life that frankly doesn’t seem all that great (Romans 12:12 – “be patient in affliction”). Even without being actually miserable, there are plenty of things that I’ve encountered in my forty years that are unpleasant, dreaded, unsettling, difficult, stinky, horrid, and that I’ve wanted delivered straight up out of. And I continue to look toward some things at this very minute that I am just really unsure about, unsure if they’ll happen, if they’ll be good, if I’ll make it through.

Sometimes, some of the things God has for me – for each of us – just aren’t great. Especially at the time. But they are necessary for me to endure in order to become who God created me to be, necessary for me to endure in order to learn a lesson that I’ll need later, necessary for me to endure in order for me to prepare to live out the calling on my life.

And so I’ve decided that while I believe with all of my heart and soul that God does have great things for me eventually, first I need to experience the right things.

The right things.

My prayer is now this: “God, as I daily try to follow the path you’ve laid out for me, to live out the purpose that I was created for, to bring glory to your name, help me to surrender wholly to you. I trust that whatever I must encounter, pleasant or unpleasant, it will be the right thing to shape me into who you have created me to be. Help me to not lose sight of that and to have a heart and a mind that are open to you on every level.”

So in my quest to live out God’s purpose, in choosing great or right, I choose right.

I choose right.

Question: Which do you choose, great or right?

Mission & Purpose

When was the last time you thought about your mission in life?
Businesses have missions to help define their purpose.
Organizations in the social sector (non-profits, schools, etc.) also have them, or should.
Mission statements should answer who you serve, how you do it, and why.

For years I have had a mission statement for my classroom that was more geared to my way of approaching instruction and also a separate statement for how I live out my life mission. Recently I have re-worked them and combined the two into one big ‘ol, all-encompassing mission statement for my life.

When I really think about it, this over-arching mission IS what drives me in all that I do, whether it’s interacting with students, parents, or colleagues at school, interacting with the cashier at Kroger, or friends, or family, or anyone else who God places in my path.

Mission statements are supposed to be the lighthouses that keep guiding us back to our chosen paths. We should be checking what we do against our missions in order to stay focused. It should help us in deciding when to say “yes”, when to take on new commitments, and when to charter new ground. And each of our missions should also help us refine and define what we do, help us evaluate, and give us permission to say “no”.

I hesitated to share mine with you, but I decided to for a couple of reasons.
1. Maybe it will encourage you to write your own
2. Maybe you can help hold me accountable if you see me wavering in living mine out as I intend to be resolute in its pursuit

I was placed on earth for this main purpose: To encourage and support others
I was also placed on earth for this secondary reason: To carry out that main purpose - encourage and support others - in the secular marketplace
(What I mean by this is that sometimes those of us who are living for Christ decide to carry out our purpose in a Christian setting. I feel called to carry out my purpose in the melting pot of society and all that that means. Either setting, in my opinion, is equally necessary and important.)

Therefore, this is my life mission:
I will leave a legacy that is shaped by how I treat others and how I reflect the light of Christ in all that I do. I will love others well, be the "hands and feet" in every opportunity, and enhance the lives of all I encounter through inspiration, encouragement, and support. I will give of self and resources sacrificially, and serve with humility, compassion, and excellence so that I leave a positive and lasting mark on the world and one day I hear, "Well done, my good and faithful servant!"

Do I always hit the mark, every day, every time? Of course not…I’m human. But living it every minute is the goal. Some days I fall short. Some days I don’t love well, some days I miss opportunities to be the hands and feet, some days I’m grouchy. Some days I am not serving with compassion and excellence – especially those I love most. Of course, some days I wonder if my boys’ mission statements include a line about breaking their mother’s spirit with their picking and fighting with each other and never putting their dishes in the dishwasher!!!

But if every day I wake up and living out this mission is what drives me, what I check everything against, what I filter my interactions and reactions through, then I think I have a pretty good chance of getting better every day, leaving a positive and impactful legacy, and hearing “Well done!”

I encourage you to wrestle with your mission and purpose if you haven’t.
How? The best way is to spend some quiet time alone with God and ask him to reveal it to you. There are also several great books that can help you discern what it is, but know that it is probably something very simple that you can do in multiple settings and job situations (as mine is encourage and support, which can be done through many avenues). It also likely has something to do with your natural gifting, passion, and hard-wiring, something that you're inclined to do already, but if you were really cognizant of it, focused on it, you could really use it to build the Kingdom.

How you live out that very simple theme will be determined by the passion that burns at your core. For instance, you could discover that your purpose is to help others. If your passion is medicine and science, you might live out that purpose by becoming a neurosurgeon. But if that is your purpose and you love the elderly, you might live that out by working or volunteering in a nursing home. The purpose here is simple and is a universal theme, how it is lived out is highly personal and tied to the person’s passion and gifting.

How do you craft a mission statement? Jot down some notes about what you want your life to be about – to stand for – what you will do, for whom you will do it (your family, your church, the world), and why you will do it. Ask God to help you define it if you’re having trouble. Don’t worry if it’s perfectly written or if it’s pretty. Don’t worry what anyone else would say about it. No one else even has to see it. It’s just for your benefit.

Keep it where you can see it. Read it every day. Let it guide you. Check what you do against it; filter your words and actions through it.

It’s your life. It’s your purpose. It’s your mission.

Live a life that has your mission written all over it, and your own powerful, unmistakable legacy will be born.

Question: What is your life mission? Why? Will you take the time and effort to put it on paper?

A Little Encouragement & Appreciation

Maybe I notice the lack of vocalized appreciation in this world because encouraging others is part of my life purpose, but the world is sorely lacking here! Maybe I notice it because it sure does go a long way for a teacher in the long, cold, gray days of January. I probably notice it because I’m focused on it: I’ve been naturally doing it my whole life…not because I’m so fabulous, there’s plenty of stuff that I stink at – that I’m not gifted at, but I am gifted to show appreciation, to encourage, and to fill others up. It comes easily for me. It’s part of my life mission. Part of my mission is to be in a mode of continually doing it myself, and part of my mission is to challenge others to do it, as well.

“The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”
-William James

I think some people feel appreciative, but they don’t know how to show it, what to say, or how to say it. Maybe some people feel that saying it sounds like they are trying to gain favor in the other person’s eyes, especially if that person is their superior (but those in leadership need to be inspired, too, and I believe that you can inspire “up”). Maybe what holds people back is that they think if they show appreciation to person A, person B will feel like they didn’t do something right. All of those things are obstacles that we put in our very own way…unfounded reasons that hold us back from doing what is life-giving to another.

Studies show that some employers have the misconception that if they show too much appreciation, employees’ work will diminish. The data proves that this is not the case as long as rewards, recognition, and appreciation are deserved, specific, and timely.

Giving encouragement and showing appreciation is so much more than a common practice in great work environments and well-functioning families. We are called to do it. It is expected of us if we are trying to follow in the footsteps of Jesus. The Bible is filled with examples of our being called to encourage and up-lift others. There are far too many passages to list, but here are a few:
Acts 20:1-2: When the uproar had ended, Paul sent for the disciples and, after encouraging them, said good-by and set out for Macedonia. He traveled through that area, speaking many words of encouragement to the people, and finally arrived in Greece.

Acts 13: After the reading from the Law and the Prophets, the synagogue rulers sent word to them, saying, "Brothers, if you have a message of encouragement for the people, please speak."

2 Samuel19:7: Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the LORD that if you don't go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth till now.

Job 16:5: But my mouth would encourage you; comfort from my lips would bring you relief.

The examples show supporting another believer in his walk with Christ, inspiring groups through acknowledging their dreams, goals and purpose, and even encouraging others to press on in the face of adversity, when they feel most like giving up.

My husband says that it just isn’t realistic to think we’d see that in the workplace – or anywhere else, that he sees too many places where it just isn’t part of the “culture”. I agree with what he sees, but that doesn’t make it ok, and that only fuels my fire to set about changing it! Barbara Glanz writes that “the need to be validated and appreciated as a worthwhile human being is greater than ever before, especially in our schools and our workplaces. A recent study indicated that last year 65% of our workforce reported that they had received no appreciation for the good work they had done.”

I can’t tell you how sad that makes me! And yet I know it to be true…I see it all around me. I see it in the workplaces of almost everyone I know and in many families, churches, and organizations, too. Why? I don’t know, and that’s why I’m on a mission to change it. It costs nothing, takes relatively little time, and even makes the one giving the encouragement or appreciation feel great.

“You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life.” –Zig Ziglar

By speaking life into others, we help them stay on the right path when they feel they can’t take another step. We help them feel important, acknowledged, listened to, and loved. We show them that they matter. We confirm that their excellent work is significant…which ultimately causes them to want to do more excellent work. We show them that they are not forgotten. We remind them that the hard times won’t last. We may speak just the right words that cause them to hang on just a little longer…until the tide turns. We are, for just a moment, the very voice of God whispering to their hearts.

Over-achievers who are shown appreciation work even harder.
Under-achievers who are shown appreciation start to raise their game.
Friends who are encouraged are kinder.
Husbands and wives who show each other appreciation start to reciprocate.
Children who are shown appreciation start to “do” without being asked.
Team members who are encouraged try harder.
Bosses who are shown appreciation go to greater lengths.

“Sometimes our light goes out but is blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light.”
-Albert Schweitzer

So, that’s my challenge to you: rekindle someone else’s light today. A kind word, or my very favorite – the hand-written note, is all it takes. For no other reason than because it needs to be said, because it’s the right thing to do, because it’s life-giving. The woman who cleans the office restrooms needs to hear it. The guy at the gas station needs to hear it. Your friend needs to hear it. The daycare worker needs to hear it. And so does your child and your husband and your boss and your co-worker.

…And just imagine how the world might start to change.

Just imagine how the world might start to change if we all started to serve for absolutely no earthly thanks or reward and began to express thanks and appreciation like people’s very lives depended on it.

Question: Who will you encourage and show appreciation to today?

Waving the White Flag

If you know me well, or at least if you read my blog post from Dec. 31st last year, you know I’m not a big fan of New Year’s Eve. I haven’t actually figured out a good way to either explain or justify my disdain for the turn of the calendar except to say that I am just that sentimental. It doesn’t make sense, given that I am a really forward-looking, future-planning person. I’m complicated that way.

Yesterday I was telling my friend Lisa how my head was about to explode because I had spent the day being excessively introspective and analytical about 2009 and was trying to be much too detailed in my planning and laying down a strategy for success in 2010. Lisa laughed as she said she’s too laid back and doesn’t do that enough, and she suggested that she needed to learn more about that. But I actually think I have a lot to learn from her!

One of my goals for 2010 is to spend more time doing some things that I love and miss like being crafty. In searching for some clever ideas, I came across Stephanie Ackerman’s blog, http://www.homegrownhospitality.typepad.com/ . If you are a crafter, you’ll love it! Stephanie has a great idea: word of the year.

I want my word to be significant to the journey I anticipate in 2010 and significant to me as a person. Even better, I want it to be significant to my walk with Christ…A word that I’ll look at, think about, and study continually.

My word for 2010 is surrender.

If you’ve only thought about the secular meaning of it, and haven’t thought much about it in the context of The Kingdom of God, the word surrender can have a negative connotation. However, our surrendering is not only a demonstration of our faith, it also pleases God. It just happens to be really, really hard for us highly type-A chicks who like to take charge of everything and everyone! But in the Kingdom Context surrender doesn’t mean give UP and throw in the towel. In this case it means to give IN and follow Christ, trusting that He is fully in control.

God’s been teaching me a lot about surrender for what seems like years. Apparently I am in the remedial surrender course, & I don’t make the progress He’d like – still trying to control things myself- or I’d have this lesson down by now! But I realize this about myself, and am ready to take it on…I need to take it on.

Matthew 10:39: He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for my sake shall find it.

I’ll have to contemplate the word surrender daily and meditate on it to remind myself that I am waving the white flag and allowing God to take total control.

So, I surrender 2009 and my fear of the unknown in 2010.
I surrender my need to do it all. (I believe God calls us to be excellent in all we do…so I’ll do less, but do it excellently and for Him.)
I surrender my need to control.
I surrender my angst about the car (post coming about this).
I surrender the 529, 403B, and all the others (2009 was not kind to our investments!).
I surrender trying to achieve balance.
I surrender school.
I surrender my business.
I surrender my time, my money, my talent.
I surrender my desire to serve where I see the need in order to follow Him where He connects me to the need that only He can see.
I surrender to following His nudges.
I surrender to Him…
I…surrender…

And so here I am, waving that white flag to signal the crossing of the finish line for 2009 and the ushering in of 2010, and I’m giving it all over to God. Every last bit. For when we are willing to become powerless in His name is the exact moment that we gain the ability to accomplish His goals, by His power, for His glory.

And that’s all I’ve ever wanted.

Question: What will your word for 2010 be? Why is that word significant to you?

When You Least Expect It

As my boys get older it is becoming harder and harder to make magical Christmas moments – the kind where they scream in delight, pixie dust and glitter is swirling, and time stands still.

This year we accomplished it – it just happened to be 2 weeks before Christmas! Last Sunday the boys were lounging around, trying to talk us into doing something fun. I was complaining about them watching too much football and embellishing a little about all I had to do that day. Then we asked if they’d like an early Christmas present…and what kid would say no to that?

But we did it! We pulled it off! They DID scream in delight - loudly! The pixie dust and glitter DID swirl! Time DID stand still, but just for a minute as the boys realized they were unwrapping tickets to that day’s Colts game! They sprinted upstairs to put on their Colt’s jerseys, we loaded up the car, and we hit the road!

The game was awesome, the experience all we’d hoped for, and the family bonding full-on.

The game ended and we left, having loved every minute of it.
That's when God showed up…

Let me set the scene: We are walking out of Lucas Oil Stadium with the rest of the 65,000 that were there – 65,000. It is chaotic. It is loud, really, really loud. Just outside the door you have to walk through a dark, echoing tunnel. In that tunnel are several guys playing drums, loudly. We are trying to talk about the game, not lose the boys, and hurry since it is cold. I can’t emphasize the noise & chaos enough.

I notice someone I know ahead of me to my left. I watch her. Then I turn my head to the right, make eye contact with the drumming guys and smile while thinking I should throw some money in the bucket by their feet.

Then I look straight ahead and stop dead in my tracks.

Straight in front of me and only a couple of feet from my face is a lady, older than I am. She looks me dead in the eye and here’s what happens next:
She says: Ma’am, do you have $25 so I can feed my kids?
I say: Yes, I do. I carry an envelope for this very purpose.
I lean in close and say: Tell me what you need.
She says: If I had $40 I could get enough food for the week.
I start to fumble in my messy purse, reaching for the envelope that I carry just for this very thing. It is so dark in the tunnel that I can barely see. My family is getting too far ahead of me…the tunnel is too loud – too many people rushing by us, yet time for this lady and me is irrelevant. I’m afraid I’m scaring her as I repeatedly yell to my family to “wait!”
Finally they stop, but are far ahead of me and really have no idea of what is going on.
She helps me hold my purse up so I can see.
I am completely calm and feel no fear.
I pull out a $50 bill.
Before handing it to her I ask: Do you know who this is from?
She answers: Jesus
I reply: Yes, it is and He wants you to know that He loves you.
I hand her the money and I start to cry.
She hugs me tight and says: Don’t cry. He blessed you so you could bless me. I love you.
I say: I love you, too, and I know you’ll be OK. I’ll be praying for you.
We part, I catch up with my family, and that was that.

A miracle right there in that tunnel.

She picked me out of 65,000 people because God nudged her that I was willing and prepared to meet her need. I responded because I was ready and am looking for those miracle encounters every single place I go.

You may think I’ve lost my mind. That’s OK with me.
You may think I'm looking for credit. I'm not. I share this with you, not for credit – for the only credit belongs to God. I share it to illustrate that God is alive and working and wants to do miraculous things at every turn, but we need to be willing to be his hands and feet. If you don’t believe me read, “You Were Born for This” by Bruce Wilkinson. It will change your life and the lives of those around you.

What’s funny is that I’d been hoping to be a miracle delivery agent for days, and every person whom I’d come across had caused me to question, “It is her?” “Is he the one?”, yet nothing - no nudges from God to act. And then on that day, when I was totally focused on my boys’ Christmas joy and pulling off that great Christmas surprise, God had an even bigger Christmas surprise in store for me.

I’ll never forget last Sunday’s events. It was a perfect day from start to finish – every last bit of it. God is crazy like that…just like we used to say in middle school, “When you least expect it...expect it!” It’s a craziness that is hard to explain, but I adore being part of it. My friend Philippe says, “It shouldn’t seem crazy…that’s just how The Kingdom works!” And Philippe is right!

So this Christmas I challenge you to embrace the craziness of an active, living Kingdom of God and be ready to be part of miracles wherever you go!

Question: Do you believe that God delivers miracles today and wants our help in making them happen?

Hold Tight

Christmas can bring out some intense emotions in people, ranging from the very best to the very worst. It can conjure up memories both dear and horrid, cause both elation and depression, and can make you see people in a whole new light. It can bring out the most giving, caring parts of our souls. And, as stated in Four Christmases (one of my favorite movies of all time), “You can’t spell families without lies”.

We see the very best demonstrated through people’s unselfish giving, through their coming together, through their thinking of others at this time of year unlike any other time.

We see their worst through fighting for deals, cutting other drivers off, stealing the closest parking places from little old ladies that have been waiting with their turn signals on for minutes by flooring it in before they even knew what happened! We see their worst through families bickering over time slots and visitation and who has to travel and even dredging up old hurts for revenge.

We see the extremes in those we know well and dearly love and in those we’ve never even met, but can observe or even feel the ripple effect.

On Thanksgiving I was talking to a family friend who was about to embark on her first-ever “Day After Thanksgiving Sale”. I listed for her the pros and cons and then told her about the first (and last) time I ever shopped on that day. I hate crowds, like sleep waaaay to much to be in the line outside of Target freezing at 4:30 a.m., and then fighting mean spirited people just to save a buck….cause nothin’ says the Birth of the Baby Jesus like being elbowed and trampled to save $20 on a PlayStation Game!!! No thanks!

Then I had to talk my own self off the ledge when I became seriously overwhelmed while trying to make my house look like it was about to be the subject of an HGTV Holiday Special. It was 8:00 on a Sunday night with a big soirée set to happen at my house in a few days. Lights for the tree from last year seemed to have lost their little twinkle…no problem…just run to Target.

But Behold! There were no lights in Target.

Off to Wal-Mart and getting irritated. Behold! No lights there either! Where’s the innkeeper when I need him? As I was scanning the aisle for white lights with a green cord (a combination that is apparently quite in demand yet unbeknownst to most retailers) another lady appeared who was looking for the same thing. I could tell she felt competitive about it, too, as I sensed her growing hostility. (Well, that and the lunges as she prepared to sprint…) I was tired. I was getting crabby. I could not fathom why the corporate buyers couldn’t understand my holiday needs.

I began the self talk: “I will not cry. I will not cry. Birth of the Baby Jesus. Birth of the Baby Jesus.”
Almost 2 hours later I was home finishing the tree, having spent about 3 hours, two trips to CVS, and laying down several more dollars than I should have needed to!

The soirée went off without a hitch and all the little details ended up being put in perspective where they belonged. What’s really funny is yesterday all of the lights on the tree just went out. All of them. I have no idea why…and get this: I don’t even care!

In the last two weeks I’ve had countless reminders about the important little things. I don’t even want anything for Christmas but to spend uninterrupted time with my family, snuggled up watching movies, talking, and having fun.

I just want to hold tight.

I want to remember how lucky I am that they are alive, that no one is in Iraq, that we are healthy, that while we could always have more, we sure have enough. I want to remember how lucky I am to live in this country, to worship freely, and to have opportunities. I want to remember how lucky I am to have someone to hold tight to.

And I want that for you.

This Christmas hold tight to those you love, feel blessed that you can, and let go of all the rest. Hold tight to the promise of that baby in the manger that was born and that died for you and me. And hold tight to the promise of a glorious eternity in Heaven.

Merry Christmas!

Question: What do you most want for Christmas? Why?

“Your Little Lights Aren’t Twinkling…”

If you know me at all, you know that 50% of what I say is movie quotes that have been woven into my normal conversations. My husband does the very same thing, which makes us almost have a language of our own at times (unless you’ve seen the movies enough times to recognize the quotes).

There are six movies in my top five movies of all time (I know…) and most of the quotes come from those. Especially Christmas Vacation. In fact, quotes from Christmas Vacation are so over-used in our family that it’s really kind of ridiculous…embarrassing even! I love that movie! This year alone I’ve already watched it 5 times and it’s not even the middle of December yet.

One of my favorite parts is when Clark can’t get the exterior illumination to light…all 25,000 bulbs. Clark’s father-in-law points out the obvious, “Your little lights aren’t twinkling…” and Clark answers, “I know, Art, and thanks for noticing.”

I love exterior illumination!! At our house we are much more subtle with the outside lighting, but I’m 100% in favor of other people being completely out of control with it!
I love to notice people’s decorations when I’m driving, especially at night.
It always makes me feel happy…
It even makes me feel connected…

In fact, it makes me feel like I can identify all the other Christians in the world that way.
I want to believe that every single bit of exterior illumination marks the houses of those who believe that Jesus is Lord and that this is the season that we proclaim His power and then we set about living it out loud for the whole rest of the year.

I want to believe this: “Oooo! Pretty lights! They’re celebrating the birth of Jesus.” “Oh, look! They are believers, too!”

Yes, I know that there are a high percentage of non-Christians who are celebrating the secular side of Christmas and that they do in fact have exterior holiday lighting.
Yes, I know that I sometimes live in “Alyssa Land”: a world where all is good, everyone knows Jesus, and everyone loves Christmas as much as Buddy the Elf – but for all the right reasons. Deep down somewhere in me, I know that isn’t real life. But I love to pretend.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if that were true?
Wouldn’t it be amazing if all the lights shouted to the world that the people in those houses loved Jesus…and if you needed help or encouragement or a miracle that those were the doors upon which you should knock?
Wouldn’t it be amazing if the people in every one of those houses went on to live as Christians every single day till it was time to put those lights up again?
Can you imagine?

As we seek Christ, as we find Him, as we follow Him, we shall have the Christmas spirit, not for one fleeting day each year, but as a companion always." -T. S. Monson

Can you imagine if we all really lived out this quote every single one of the 364 remaining days of the year? Every year?

What if we left those lights on all the time, year round, to mark our houses so that other believers could find community and non-believers could seek solace and compassion there?

I know everyone will take them down. I guess we will, too, so as not to be the basis for that line in Redneck Woman. But you can bet that I’m going to make an effort to live a life where my lights are twinkling “the whole year through”…where my lights twinkle as much for the Cousin Eddies & Ruby Sues of the world as they do for my family…where I extend grace equally when trees go up in flames, dogs and squirrels destroy the house, or crazy cousins park worn down RVs in my driveway (maybe not as much for emptying the tank into the storm sewer…) as I do when all is well with the world.

It’ll be hard, but I’ll try.

How about you? Will your little lights be twinkling?

Question: How will you live Christmas “the whole year through”?

So Very Thankful

So very thankful for friends and family
For my precious twins and my soul-mate husband
For healthy parents who live nearby
For Diet Coke
For Charmin Ultra
For the Sunday Star read on the velvet chaise lounge in my kitchen
For deodorant and Always
For throaty V-8 engines with killer stereos that blare Van Halen 1984
For rag tops thrown back on sunny summer days
For this great country
So thankful for bosses who do not micromanage
For indoor plumbing and steamy hot showers
For electric blankets and toasty fires
For peptides and hyaluronic filling spheres
For skilled hair stylists and Kenra 25
For cameras
For great shoes
For the trailblazing women who’ve gone before me
For strong men
For Carol Anderson and Ann Taylor
So thankful for El Jaripeo
For electricity
For mascara and lipstick
For Glee and The Office
For Cousin Eddie and Clark and Ruby Sue
For cards mailed with stamps
For photos and scrapbooks and memories that grip your soul
For time spent and tears shed
For howling laughter and deep mourning
So very thankful for opportunities not missed
For lessons learned
For mountains climbed and valleys survived
For knowing the value of a hard day’s work
For loving well and being well loved
For baseball and pianos and songs sung with your whole heart
For trumpets and jokes and paintings and stories
For prayers and goodnight kisses
For fresh cookies and warm bread with real butter
For foot massages and snugly boys
So thankful for passion that burns deep
For hurts and healing and fear and nudges
For life lived and not missed
And for Christ’s blood shed for both you and me

Happy Thanksgiving

Question: What are you thankful for?

35 Minutes Anywhere, Frankly

I really love Rascal Flatts!...I mean luuuuv them…Have seen ‘em several times live & have even been back stage (super cool). I love so many of their songs… (I interrupt this blog to suggest a really great Christmas present for anyone looking to buy me something life-changing: I want them to come over for dinner, I’ll make whatever Gary wants, and then we will all sit around my living room and I get to sing with them…every single song! Heaven.) …Anyway, one of their songs that really makes me think is Mayberry.

What they sing? I agree.

The world spins way too fast.
We need to slow down.
Take some time.
Connect.

I’d like to add another verse, too. Something about turning off the technology and actually looking each other in the eye, talking – deeply. Embracing. Sitting. Abiding…

I recently attended a leadership conference at my church that was filled with outstanding points. One of them was that we have to connect with God. I agree.
Daily. I agree.
The next point was new…and freeing:
Some of us love to read the bible and journal, in the morning, for the oft-proposed 35 minute block of uninterrupted time, and if you love it, absolutely do it. But this point was also made:
That’s not how all of us connect to God.
That’s not how all of us connect and it’s OK.
And in scripture, Jesus connected with His own Father in all kinds of ways, at all kinds of times. Jesus was not boxed into 35 minutes of journal writing every morning. And we are certainly not meant to close that journal after 35 minutes and say, “OK, God…great talk! See you tomorrow!”

WOW!

In fact, some people have been made to feel guilty and inadequate because they find journaling to be a chore…and they’re not morning people…and if they’ve got 7 kids under the age of 5, they don’t have 35 minutes in a row. Ever.

The speaker asked us to concentrate on our times of most powerful connection with God.
Mine?
I do love to read and ponder scripture.
Journaling…not so much.
In the morning…rarely.
But 35 minutes, when I gotta get out the door…That’s a laugh.
(I know some of you are thinking, “Just set your alarm for earlier, sister!”…Apparently, you don’t know me well enough. Night owl…God wired me like that…Hmmmm…)

Maybe it’s just that I can’t be that boxed in.
Maybe it’s because I don’t like other people telling me the best way for me to connect with God.
Maybe it’s because this life-long goody-two-shoes has a rebellious streak when someone wants me to do it like everyone else.

But this much I know to be true:
God wants us to connect with Him. Daily.
He wants a deep, abiding, rich, personal relationship with us.
He cares about every little detail of our lives.
And how about this radical thought? He wants us jotting down the insights he sends to us, running to look up a verse in scripture, sending up prayers right and left, talking and joking (yes, I really did say that!) all day long.
All. Day. Long.
I really doubt that He is concerned with all of the other stuff surrounding how we get there…just as long as we do get there.

Some of my most powerful moments and deepest connections have been late, late at night. Some have been while witnessing some spectacular aesthetic in nature. Some have been while witnessing to another person. Some have been while serving another person. Some have been while realizing how small and insignificant I really am. Some have been in the shower, where streams of tears join a river of steamy water. Many have occurred in the car. Many more have involved music.

Were those any less significant because they were not from 6:00 to 6:35am with a pen and a journal? Of course not.

So be free to experience God in your way. In your time. Throughout the day. All day. But every day. With no guilt about how. At least 35 minutes total, anywhere, frankly…just me and the power of God…just you and the power of God.

The point about connecting with Him is this: Just find a way to do it!

This Old House

A few days ago I had to run an errand that caused me to drive past the house we moved out of almost 3 years ago.

It looked nice…well cared for… But it was mine for seven years and yet it didn’t look like me at all. I’m glad I didn’t see the inside. I’m sure it’s clean. I’m sure they’re taking good care of it. But I’m sure it would be even less recognizable to me than the outside is.

We built that house. We poured our hearts and souls into it, we nurtured every bit of it, and we painstakingly chose every interior and exterior detail from finishing the basement to adding molding in every last spot, from the landscaping to the back porch we added on.

It’s strange to drive by a house you once lived in…like you know it like the back of your hand and find it completely unrecognizable all at the same time. It creates this strange disconnected connection that I can barely explain.

I drove away feeling grateful for that house…it was perfect for us at the time…but grateful to not live there now since it doesn’t seem to fit me anymore. I felt even more grateful, though, for our current house…it is perfect for us right here, right now…and I think it looks like me & it certainly feels like me.

It made me think about our lives as we grow in relationship with Jesus. As we move from “unbeliever” to “believer” we change in some big ways. Our old selves are as unrecognizable as the house I describe. We can look back on our time before having a personal relationship with Jesus and not even relate to that person we were before. It’s still the same “house”, but what inhabits it – or WHO inhabits it - has changed significantly!

Because of Jesus we are changed.
Because of Him we are made new.
And when we pursue Him daily, we continually grow and evolve into the people that He created us to be.

And just like I felt about our old house, we can be grateful for who we were, where we were at the time, but even more grateful for what we’ve become in Christ, having grown to fit His image of us.

May Christ forever dwell within you!

Question: How have you changed as you’ve grown in relationship with Christ? Do you even recognize your previous self?

To 6th Grade Boys Everywhere…

Dear 6th Grade Boys,

We, your mothers, want to remind you of a few very important life lessons. These are lessons that you just have to accept, so don’t argue with us (you won’t win anyway). This is just how it is, and the sooner you learn and accept the following, the easier your lives will be.

1.) Deodorant DOES NOT help stink that you already have! It’s as simple as right & wrong, up & down:
Soap is for stink you already have.
Deod is for stink you don’t want to get.
We simply can’t explain this anymore! So, every time you take a shower and rid yourself of your previous stink, you MUST reapply new deod as a stink-preventing measure! End of story!

2.) Wrinkly shirts make you look like you don’t care. And maybe you don’t. But like it or not, you’re now at the age when it will serve you well to at least act like you do!

3.) You have to wash your face! We don’t care if you don’t want to or you don’t like it. When you don’t, you get pimples. Yes, we mothers do love you enough to pop them…for 12 years now we’ve run the gamut of blood, puke, snot, & urine. Trust us, a little pimple poppin’ ain’t gonna scare us away! So you have a choice to make: us chasin’ you down with toner-laden cotton balls or you can take care of it yourselves.

4.) We’re not expecting you to be like some of those adorable, charming, melt-a-mother’s heart 12-year olds that we see on TV sometimes, but we do expect you to master and use 3 or 4 social phrases such as “nice to meet you”, “great to see you again”, “I _______ (play baseball, play the trumpet, am interested in U.S. History…) – thanks for asking.”, and “I’m fine, thank you. How are you?”

5.) Think something and know why you think it. Even if you don’t agree with your brilliant mothers on everything, take a stand and be able to defend it! We want you to be leaders, not followers.

6.) We’ve taught you manners. Could you at least use them sometimes so we know you “got it”? Whether you’re the President or simply invited to the White House someday (as we know you will be – you’re just that fabulous!), you’ll need to know which fork is for salad, which spoon is for dessert, and to chew with your mouths closed!

7.) We know you love bathroom words…words that describe bodily functions…words that gross a mother out. We know it, even though we don’t like or understand it. But there IS a time and place, for the love of Pete…and the dining room table at Grandma’s is not it!

8.) You are now at the age when you must take personal responsibility for your own faith, your relationship with Jesus Christ. We’ve tried our best. We’ve taught you right. We’ve told you how it is. We’ve taken you to church. We hope you understand now that your actions and beliefs have consequences…eternal ones. Now it’s time for you to take the reigns. We want you to long outlive us, have decades of happy and productive lives. But if you die tomorrow, you’ll have to stand at the feet of Jesus and answer for yourselves. Be clear about what you believe…and if you’re not, talk to someone who knows biblical truth. We say this not to be harsh, but because we love you more than life itself. We know this is some heavy stuff, but our first and most important job is to love you. Our second is to tell it to you straight. We want you to spend your eternity in Heaven with Jesus…nothing matters more.

No matter how tall you grow, how much armpit hair you get, and how deep your voices become, you’ll always be our babies. Nothing you could ever do would change how much we love you…unconditionally…and for all time.
Love,
Your Mothers

Hungry…Starving, Actually

Do you know that feeling when you’re craving salt, so you eat some chips then think, “Nope. That wasn’t it”? So you eat some chocolate, thinking you must satisfy the need for sweet. “Nope. Not it, either.” …Back to the chips…

…You’re hungry, and you keep eating, but you sure can’t quite get full, you're never satisfied, cravings never cease, pangs don’t go away…

That’s how I am for God.

Starved. Famished. Ravenous.
Never enough.
My hunger is never satisfied, my thirst never quenched.

I seek Him daily in many places, in many ways. I nourish my soul with Christian books, Christian music, scripture, prayer, meditation…everything about Him that I can get my hands on to better know Him and to experience Him more, but it’s never enough.

These two unbelievably wonderful quotes are from Tozer:
“To have found God and still pursue Him is the soul’s paradox of love, scorned indeed by the too-easily-satisfied religionist, but justified in happy existence by the children of the burning heart.”

“We are called to an everlasting preoccupation with God.”

Psalm 42:1-2 As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God?

James 4:8 Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Jeremiah 29:13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

The more I feed on the things of God, the hungrier I am. In seeking Him, He fills me daily, yet I’m starved for Him. And that is the same wish that I hold for each of you, my friends:
May you seek Him with all of your heart. May you be starving, famished, ravenous for God and never satisfied!

Question: How hungry are you for God? What difference do you think it makes?

40 and ????

Well, I’m almost a week in. The big 4-0 came and went last Sunday and the world did not stop turning. It’s not like I’m depressed or stressed or on the verge of a mid-life crises (though I can’t be sure…).

These questions loom for me:
40 and fabulous…or frumpy?
40 and fearless…or frightened?
40 and have it all figured out…or full of it (!) ?

Maybe I’ll never know. And maybe I’m a little of each of those, depending on the moment, depending on the day.
I really hope that at age 40 I am not at the half-way point, but that is not for me to know, and I think this is the underlying reality check that causes people to stop in their tracks at these milestone birthdays and contemplate:
What did I do in the first 40 years that really matters, and what had I better get moving on starting today, right now?

In some ways I think I’ve done OK.
Yet in some ways I think I have not begun to scratch the surface of becoming who God intends for me to be.
And I wonder…is that my fault, did I stunt my own progress? Or did God not only plot my path, but also my days in which to land at each marker?

I realize the introspective nature of these questions, even the heaviness at times, but if we don’t ask, evaluate, and analyze how will we have any sense of the continuum on which we travel?

In the first 40 years I know that I have done some important things.
I also did some stupid stuff.
And I literally thank God that it’s not too late to have some great big plans for the next 40 years…to make sure that the answers ARE fabulous, fearless, and figured out, to teach some more kids to read, bring some people to Jesus, change some lives, give away thousands (let’s get crazy and say millions here, God!), raise faithful boys who live out their passions and dreams, grow old with my soul mate, embrace my friends, inspire others, shake the system & rock the boat, leave a legacy, …and change the world.

Age has no relevance for God.
Look at Abraham and Sarah and Noah.
(Side bar: Hey God, by the way, it is A-OK if we skip the childbearing at 90 business! I can NOT imagine the stretch marks from that! Whew!)
Amazing things were done to further the Kingdom of God, things that we still very much feel the ripple effect of today, by them and many more.

I just want to make sure that in the next 40 years (and beyond), everyone I come in contact with is better for having known me, and that I am the hands and feet of Jesus in my community, the face of Jesus in the crowd every single chance I get.

Gotta go! The clock is ticking, and I have to do nothing short of changing the world for the Kingdom of God!

Question: What will YOU do in the next 40 years to change the world for the Kingdom of God?

Shock & Awe

I love to shock people.

Not in the “I just went and had my body completely pierced and sleeved” kind of way…
More in the “you think you have me totally figured out and you so do not, mister” kind of way.

I’ve been told I am a little high maintenance. A little complicated. A tough nut to crack.
Fine by me.
How boring would life be if we were each a Myers-Briggs ESFP? I enjoy being a complex INTJ. It is, after all, who God made me to be…for a reason. And if you know anything about Myers-Briggs and those 16 personality types, you know that my personality isn’t one known for enjoying shock value.

I am absolutely too straight-laced. Therefore, people don’t think I’m funny, so I love to surprise with an off-the-cuff funny remark.

I am extremely opinionated. I keep those opinions to myself a lot of the time so as not to cause too much eyebrow raising, but sometimes I love to listen long and hard, saying nothing, as though I might not care…or know…only to interject my opinion at the perfect moment backed by cold, hard fact.

I love to be an original and despise being copied. Just when someone thinks they have me figured out, I love to do something completely to the contrary just to keep them guessing. (For this I probably do need counseling, referrals welcome…)

But here’s my favorite: I love to shock people with the truth of Jesus, with the love of Jesus, with the heart of Jesus, and when they least expect it.

I love to shock people by doing things that are so far outside the lines of the secular world in which we live that the non-believer, or even the believer, on the receiving end is so stunned they don’t know how to respond.

Just today I had to call a company about a problem and speak to the customer service rep. I was really concerned about a breech of confidential information and the woman took care of it quickly and put my mind at ease. As we hung up I said, “You have no idea how you have helped me today. I hope God blesses you in return for how you have blessed me.”
Ya cudda heard a pin drop….
“Um, wow…thank you so much, ma’am!” was her response. Clearly she doesn’t get much of that blessing stuff at her job.
Jesus meets customer service…

A few days ago I had to call a credit card company that was trying to send me a card & all I had to do was activate it, except that I didn’t want it. I realized that they had us listed as a pending application, which “Mr. Chad McCool Envelope System” did not want on his credit. Good little Discover Card worker that she was just really wanted me to go ahead and open that account in case I ever needed it…even though I was telling her I didn’t need or want it.
I had no choice but to pull out the shock and awe!
Oh, to have seen her reaction would have been priceless when I said, “Well, we are trying hard to live by the rules of Kingdom Finance and part of that for us is following the methods of Dave Ramsey. We’re working hard to pay off all of our credit card debt and cut up our cards (!), and any other debt, so we can even start to work on the overwhelming task of paying off our mortgage in short order. It’s really going to take a lot of hard work and discipline to do all of that and continue to give like we want to. I know that your job is to extend credit, but I just really feel God laying it on my heart to be strict in this.” She laughed at me. (Hey, it ain’t the first time…and it won’t be the last!) Then she told me that she’s watched Dave Ramsey on TV a couple of times. I thanked her for helping me make sure that card didn’t become active and told her that God would bless her for helping me stay on track. I could feel the shock and awe reverberating through the phone line!
Jesus meets 1-800-discover.


Recently I made a call to a utility company. I explained that I bypassed all of the automated choices because none applied. I had to talk to a real person. I explained that I was calling so that I could pay both the current bill and the overdue bill of a family whom I knew could not pay their own. At first the man on the other end could not even understand what I was trying to do. He kept asking me who I was with, what company I was from. I kept responding with varying versions of “I’m not with any company. I’m one of a really small group of people who likes to go around paying other people’s bills.”
When he still seemed to have a bad case of shock and awe, I finally said, “I’m with Jesus.”
He very slowly answered, “We don’t get a lot of that.”
Jesus meets the utility company guy.

I hope that day that I was the vehicle for God to move for that family. I also hope I was a witness to Jesus being alive and active in this world to the guy on the other end of the phone. Very powerful stuff if I was able to do both.

Now these are some of those stories that I’ve mentioned I hesitate to share, but my dear friend Julie has convinced me that sharing it is where the real leadership is.

But here’s what you absolutely must know:
This is not about me! This is about God. Focus on God. Shock and Awe for God, by God, because of God. And it has nothing to do with me other than the fact that I am daily trying to be His hands and feet out there in my very own community, directly impacting one life at a time.

Jesus will show up anywhere that you take Him.
Oh, I know He can get there on His own, but He’s waiting to see how we’ll pack him up and carry Him with us everywhere we go.
For years I’ve been praying the prayer of Jabez. My territory IS being enlarged. But the world is full of noise and distraction and sometimes it takes more than a whisper to get people’s attention.
Sometimes it takes full-scale warfare.

Sometimes it takes shock and awe to shake the system, to sufficiently rock the boat…
…but WOW, the stories…the power of God in it…the legacy…the eternal significance…

WOW!

Question: Where have you taken Jesus today? How have you shocked and awed in His name?

In A Fog

A heavy fog hangs in the early morning air as I write this.

It's the kind that we often see on September mornings in central Indiana, except maybe heavier than normal. You can almost see the droplets of precipitation that hover within it, and the air is thick with its presence.

Driving is difficult in fog like this. Every few feet is a new wall of obstruction, and only when you arrive at that wall are the next few feet unveiled.
And then the next.
And then the next.

Fog seems like such an obvious metaphor for faith in life.

Many times things seem foggy. Many times answers are so very far from clear. Many times the path is completely veiled and nothing is revealed in advance.

When we step out in faith sometimes we expect that more will be revealed to us than actually is, but it is like that foggy road with just a few feet exposed at a time. God doesn't promise to show us the whole road of our journey. He asks us to travel with Him...Him leading the way....us relying wholly on Him through His clear sight since our own vision is clouded not only by all of the distractions of life, but also by the sheer and simple fact that it is not to be known by us.

I hope you'll begin to look at fog in a whole new way: as a beautiful reminder of how God calls us to be completely dependent on Him, so much so that without Him we are unable to even order our steps for more than a few feet.

I love what Martin Luther King, Jr. says: "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

Just take the first step...travel those first few feet...go that first little distance...

That is what faith is...traveling on the road we can not see and trusting that God is guiding us every step of the way.

Question: How do you allow God to guide you on your daily path?

Vera

I had to go to the Wal-Mart Vision Center today. I was already not thrilled to be going there because a.) I had a mile-long list of other stuff I needed to do today, and b.) I’d already been there twice and couldn’t get someone to understand what I needed/wanted (or I couldn’t articulate it so that they could).

Already not excited to be going there, my less than stellar attitude collided with complete impatience when my friend and partner in rescuing the poor and down-trodden called to say we should meet for lunch. “I can’t…I’m at the Wal-Mart Vision Center”, I explained. Her response was “that’s a pretty darn good thing, cause I’m on my way to Wal-Mart to buy shampoo right now!”

She’s a spontaneous sort of gal…I have a lot to learn about that…so out the window went the to-do list for today, but based on a sermon a few weeks ago, I thought that God would be proud if I could be a little less rigid in the name of authentic relationships.

Little did either of us know what He had planned for us today…

With no one really understanding my needs yet in the vision center I was forced to wait for no reason, but just listen to what God did during that wait time:
**My friend paid for her stuff and came and sat with me.

**We watched a lady, who maybe wasn’t the most fashion-forward, try on some super-cool and ultra-funky glasses…her whole face lit up. Her confidence grew. She knew her cool factor rose about 50 million points in that moment. We both told her she HAD to get them. Then we eavesdropped while the worker told her the price and we prayed (yes, I do mean literally) that she’d be able to buy them. I was prepared to step in if need be. Every person deserves to feel good about herself.

**Everyone in the whole joint looked grumpy…now I wasn’t too thrilled about being there myself at first, but once you’re there you have a choice to make: suck it up and make the best of it, or wallow in it. I choose the first one…AND I’m pretty much going to make you go to that happy place with me…Your light (or darkness) can absolutely change an entire room. (Google “Fish” by Lundin, Paul, & Christensen if you need a little help with that!!) So….friend and I started talking to the people around us, talking a little louder, talking with a little more animation, talking with a little more laughter. And the whole room changed. (This little light of mine…I’m gonna let it shine…)

**As they called me back I thought, “that wait wasn’t so long”…(because I changed!)

**The doctor, a different one than last time, not only listened, but solved my issue quickly (LOVE that!). Upon leaving, smiling broadly, I said, “Thanks so much for really listening to me! I truly felt heard…and that was the kind of customer service I was looking for.” …Compliments are meant to be spoken…

AND here’s the real kicker:

**My friend struck up a conversation with the “Have A Nice Day” lady on the way out (I don’t think you can call her a greeter when she’s at the exit saying goodbye…). Her name is Vera. We've never met this woman, mind you. She was a sweet, darling, little old thing…maybe in her late 70’s. As we spoke with her, really listening…so she would feel heard…we learned that she loved her job at Wal-Mart. She never wanted to quit, but she might have to quit because she can no longer see to drive. She told us that she loved working, and she had just put her dog of fourteen years down and she cried every day about it (talk about speaking straight to my very own heart!). She told us that if she couldn’t come there to work she’d be so lonely and would probably “sit down and die”.

WOW!

You can argue with me six ways from Sunday on whether or not God hangs out at Wal-Mart, but you can never convince me that the two of us were not supposed to talk to this woman.

In the course of our short conversation with her, we’d arranged transportation to and from work starting next week if it turned out that she really did need it. We’d proved someone cares. We’d validated her work ethic. We’d shown her friendship. We’d let her know that age is just a number and that no one has to “sit down and die” if he or she still has the desire to make a difference & spread a little joy! And we’d witnessed about Jesus in Wal-Mart.

Jesus. In Wal-Mart.

WOW!

And we left with tears in our eye, knowing that He orchestrated the whole darn thing for the good of those that love Him, for the opportunity to be presented, to see what we’d do in response, to make available to Vera His hands and feet.

I have many stories like this. I’ve hesitated to share many, believing that my works should be anonymous. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe if we all talked a little more, supported each other a little more in these kinds of efforts, challenged each other a little more, the world would be a different place.

Keep your eyes and ears open…the Veras are everywhere and God is just waiting to see what we'll do!

Question: What can you do today to witness, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, to an unlikely person in an unlikely place?