Diamonds and Brick Dust

I don’t usually cry about baseball. Last night I did. Will’s team lost in a heartbreaker championship game to a long-time rival, and I despise losing. But that’s not why I cried.

I cried because it’s the end of an era.

For eight years my boys have played baseball on the fields at Shamrock Springs. From Instructional League T-ball, to the 5^th and 6^th grade Majors, Rocks Travel Baseball, and everything in between. And now it’s over.

Those fields hold memories too numerous to count – of hard-fought victories, of agonizing defeat, of wonderful people, of coaches that possibly have a calling other than coaching, and of amazing coaches that have impacted our lives forever.

Those fields hold the promise of tiny boys with huge dreams and untold promise…so small they can barely carry their own bat bags.

And they hold the promise of big boys who don’t smell so good after a game, who might really have the chance for baseball to help pay for college. They also hold the stark reality of boys who love a game more than it loves them – who are blessed with talent, just a talent for something other than baseball.

And those fields hold the promise of unearthing the few young men who have been given an arm or a bat that could have only come from God and no one knew it till they stepped across that white line.

Those fields hold sweet Americana – the crack of the bat, the sounds of cheering, and the smells of hot dogs and sunscreen and brick dust and summer and innocent childhood.

Those fields hold my heart.

Oh, there’ll be more baseball. Hopefully school teams, maybe Noblesville Babe Ruth, and possibly other travel teams. But it will never be the same again. Never again on the fields at Shamrock Springs. Never again through WYSI. Never again with those same precious people.

But I’m grateful for the experience and grateful to the game. I’ve learned so much during our years there - lessons in baseball that translate to lessons in life:

*Shake it off: You’re going to mess up, but in a second there will be another play and a chance to redeem yourself

*Sometimes you’re gonna get a fast ball and other times a curve: Make the best of whatever life throws you

*Stance is everything: At the plate success is about getting your weight back and having proper balance. Success in life is about balance, too.

*Losing stinks: Especially when it is a hard-fought loss, but men of great character are never born out of victory alone. Losing teaches not only character, but also humility, and tenacity, and drive…it shows you what you’re made of. And it makes the wins you do get that much sweeter.

*Composure: Especially on the mound, composure is key. No matter the call, no matter how much the strike zone seems to move in a given game, no matter how much it is not going your way, hold that head up, get those shoulders back, and run onto that field (or stare down that batter as you wind up) like you have total command – even when you don’t feel like you do. Same is true in life.

*Hit hard, run fast, give it all you’ve got, and then come home. Home should always be the place you most want to get back to.

*If the coach says to take, you gotta take, even when you want to swing: Sometimes God is going to get you in a situation where doing the right thing or waiting or taking the lesser path (getting a walk when you wanted to be a power hitter) isn’t what you want to do, but He can see the bigger picture and He knows what’s best. You’re smart to be obedient.

*Communication is everything: From signals to yelling “mine”, the team can’t work if the team isn’t talking.

*Attitude matters: skill is really important, but you can be highly skilled and have a horrible attitude – and you’ll get no where fast.

*Good sportsmanship always wins: You earn my respect when you display good sportsmanship both on and off the field. It always wins…even when you lose.

And so goes life. Both the good and the bad always do end. I know there are more great and fun and wonderful things ahead with my boys. But this? This was extra sweet.

For all that the game is…

For all that it taught us…

For the role it played in shaping my sweet little boys into fine young men…

Baseball will always hold my heart.

A special thanks to Coach McCool, Coach Nicole, and Coach Crupi. Words will never express the blessing you’ve been over the years and the influence you've had.

Great...or Right

Great…or Right...

I’ve been praying a lot about a particular thing over the last several months. It’s something that causes me to need to surrender to God every single day. It’s something that I have no control over, at least not right now. It’s something that is really making me step out in faith on several levels. And it’s something that can easily overwhelm me, cause me worry, doubt, and even dread if I let it.

But prayer always calms me. Focuses me. Gets my head and heart back where it should be.

Yet I’ve realized that I haven’t been saying what I should say to God.

We know that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him” (Romans 8:28), and I refer to this scripture and others like it often. I find that especially when I’m looking toward something that I’m anxious about, it helps to say something like: “God, I am trying hard to hear you and to follow what I believe is your will for me, and I know you have great things for me.”

Great things.

Something about reminding myself that God has great things for me makes me feel better. I know that He does have great things for me, and He does for you, too. His plan for us, as we follow Him and daily seek Him, His word, His will, is not for us to continually dwell in misery. (Romans 8:28, Psalm 37:4, Matt. 11:28, Phil. 4:6, just to cite a few.)

However, the truth is that sometimes we are going to endure something miserable – an event or a season in life that frankly doesn’t seem all that great (Romans 12:12 – “be patient in affliction”). Even without being actually miserable, there are plenty of things that I’ve encountered in my forty years that are unpleasant, dreaded, unsettling, difficult, stinky, horrid, and that I’ve wanted delivered straight up out of. And I continue to look toward some things at this very minute that I am just really unsure about, unsure if they’ll happen, if they’ll be good, if I’ll make it through.

Sometimes, some of the things God has for me – for each of us – just aren’t great. Especially at the time. But they are necessary for me to endure in order to become who God created me to be, necessary for me to endure in order to learn a lesson that I’ll need later, necessary for me to endure in order for me to prepare to live out the calling on my life.

And so I’ve decided that while I believe with all of my heart and soul that God does have great things for me eventually, first I need to experience the right things.

The right things.

My prayer is now this: “God, as I daily try to follow the path you’ve laid out for me, to live out the purpose that I was created for, to bring glory to your name, help me to surrender wholly to you. I trust that whatever I must encounter, pleasant or unpleasant, it will be the right thing to shape me into who you have created me to be. Help me to not lose sight of that and to have a heart and a mind that are open to you on every level.”

So in my quest to live out God’s purpose, in choosing great or right, I choose right.

I choose right.

Question: Which do you choose, great or right?

Mission & Purpose

When was the last time you thought about your mission in life?
Businesses have missions to help define their purpose.
Organizations in the social sector (non-profits, schools, etc.) also have them, or should.
Mission statements should answer who you serve, how you do it, and why.

For years I have had a mission statement for my classroom that was more geared to my way of approaching instruction and also a separate statement for how I live out my life mission. Recently I have re-worked them and combined the two into one big ‘ol, all-encompassing mission statement for my life.

When I really think about it, this over-arching mission IS what drives me in all that I do, whether it’s interacting with students, parents, or colleagues at school, interacting with the cashier at Kroger, or friends, or family, or anyone else who God places in my path.

Mission statements are supposed to be the lighthouses that keep guiding us back to our chosen paths. We should be checking what we do against our missions in order to stay focused. It should help us in deciding when to say “yes”, when to take on new commitments, and when to charter new ground. And each of our missions should also help us refine and define what we do, help us evaluate, and give us permission to say “no”.

I hesitated to share mine with you, but I decided to for a couple of reasons.
1. Maybe it will encourage you to write your own
2. Maybe you can help hold me accountable if you see me wavering in living mine out as I intend to be resolute in its pursuit

I was placed on earth for this main purpose: To encourage and support others
I was also placed on earth for this secondary reason: To carry out that main purpose - encourage and support others - in the secular marketplace
(What I mean by this is that sometimes those of us who are living for Christ decide to carry out our purpose in a Christian setting. I feel called to carry out my purpose in the melting pot of society and all that that means. Either setting, in my opinion, is equally necessary and important.)

Therefore, this is my life mission:
I will leave a legacy that is shaped by how I treat others and how I reflect the light of Christ in all that I do. I will love others well, be the "hands and feet" in every opportunity, and enhance the lives of all I encounter through inspiration, encouragement, and support. I will give of self and resources sacrificially, and serve with humility, compassion, and excellence so that I leave a positive and lasting mark on the world and one day I hear, "Well done, my good and faithful servant!"

Do I always hit the mark, every day, every time? Of course not…I’m human. But living it every minute is the goal. Some days I fall short. Some days I don’t love well, some days I miss opportunities to be the hands and feet, some days I’m grouchy. Some days I am not serving with compassion and excellence – especially those I love most. Of course, some days I wonder if my boys’ mission statements include a line about breaking their mother’s spirit with their picking and fighting with each other and never putting their dishes in the dishwasher!!!

But if every day I wake up and living out this mission is what drives me, what I check everything against, what I filter my interactions and reactions through, then I think I have a pretty good chance of getting better every day, leaving a positive and impactful legacy, and hearing “Well done!”

I encourage you to wrestle with your mission and purpose if you haven’t.
How? The best way is to spend some quiet time alone with God and ask him to reveal it to you. There are also several great books that can help you discern what it is, but know that it is probably something very simple that you can do in multiple settings and job situations (as mine is encourage and support, which can be done through many avenues). It also likely has something to do with your natural gifting, passion, and hard-wiring, something that you're inclined to do already, but if you were really cognizant of it, focused on it, you could really use it to build the Kingdom.

How you live out that very simple theme will be determined by the passion that burns at your core. For instance, you could discover that your purpose is to help others. If your passion is medicine and science, you might live out that purpose by becoming a neurosurgeon. But if that is your purpose and you love the elderly, you might live that out by working or volunteering in a nursing home. The purpose here is simple and is a universal theme, how it is lived out is highly personal and tied to the person’s passion and gifting.

How do you craft a mission statement? Jot down some notes about what you want your life to be about – to stand for – what you will do, for whom you will do it (your family, your church, the world), and why you will do it. Ask God to help you define it if you’re having trouble. Don’t worry if it’s perfectly written or if it’s pretty. Don’t worry what anyone else would say about it. No one else even has to see it. It’s just for your benefit.

Keep it where you can see it. Read it every day. Let it guide you. Check what you do against it; filter your words and actions through it.

It’s your life. It’s your purpose. It’s your mission.

Live a life that has your mission written all over it, and your own powerful, unmistakable legacy will be born.

Question: What is your life mission? Why? Will you take the time and effort to put it on paper?

A Little Encouragement & Appreciation

Maybe I notice the lack of vocalized appreciation in this world because encouraging others is part of my life purpose, but the world is sorely lacking here! Maybe I notice it because it sure does go a long way for a teacher in the long, cold, gray days of January. I probably notice it because I’m focused on it: I’ve been naturally doing it my whole life…not because I’m so fabulous, there’s plenty of stuff that I stink at – that I’m not gifted at, but I am gifted to show appreciation, to encourage, and to fill others up. It comes easily for me. It’s part of my life mission. Part of my mission is to be in a mode of continually doing it myself, and part of my mission is to challenge others to do it, as well.

“The deepest principle of human nature is a craving to be appreciated.”
-William James

I think some people feel appreciative, but they don’t know how to show it, what to say, or how to say it. Maybe some people feel that saying it sounds like they are trying to gain favor in the other person’s eyes, especially if that person is their superior (but those in leadership need to be inspired, too, and I believe that you can inspire “up”). Maybe what holds people back is that they think if they show appreciation to person A, person B will feel like they didn’t do something right. All of those things are obstacles that we put in our very own way…unfounded reasons that hold us back from doing what is life-giving to another.

Studies show that some employers have the misconception that if they show too much appreciation, employees’ work will diminish. The data proves that this is not the case as long as rewards, recognition, and appreciation are deserved, specific, and timely.

Giving encouragement and showing appreciation is so much more than a common practice in great work environments and well-functioning families. We are called to do it. It is expected of us if we are trying to follow in the footsteps of Jesus. The Bible is filled with examples of our being called to encourage and up-lift others. There are far too many passages to list, but here are a few:
Acts 20:1-2: When the uproar had ended, Paul sent for the disciples and, after encouraging them, said good-by and set out for Macedonia. He traveled through that area, speaking many words of encouragement to the people, and finally arrived in Greece.

Acts 13: After the reading from the Law and the Prophets, the synagogue rulers sent word to them, saying, "Brothers, if you have a message of encouragement for the people, please speak."

2 Samuel19:7: Now go out and encourage your men. I swear by the LORD that if you don't go out, not a man will be left with you by nightfall. This will be worse for you than all the calamities that have come upon you from your youth till now.

Job 16:5: But my mouth would encourage you; comfort from my lips would bring you relief.

The examples show supporting another believer in his walk with Christ, inspiring groups through acknowledging their dreams, goals and purpose, and even encouraging others to press on in the face of adversity, when they feel most like giving up.

My husband says that it just isn’t realistic to think we’d see that in the workplace – or anywhere else, that he sees too many places where it just isn’t part of the “culture”. I agree with what he sees, but that doesn’t make it ok, and that only fuels my fire to set about changing it! Barbara Glanz writes that “the need to be validated and appreciated as a worthwhile human being is greater than ever before, especially in our schools and our workplaces. A recent study indicated that last year 65% of our workforce reported that they had received no appreciation for the good work they had done.”

I can’t tell you how sad that makes me! And yet I know it to be true…I see it all around me. I see it in the workplaces of almost everyone I know and in many families, churches, and organizations, too. Why? I don’t know, and that’s why I’m on a mission to change it. It costs nothing, takes relatively little time, and even makes the one giving the encouragement or appreciation feel great.

“You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on a life.” –Zig Ziglar

By speaking life into others, we help them stay on the right path when they feel they can’t take another step. We help them feel important, acknowledged, listened to, and loved. We show them that they matter. We confirm that their excellent work is significant…which ultimately causes them to want to do more excellent work. We show them that they are not forgotten. We remind them that the hard times won’t last. We may speak just the right words that cause them to hang on just a little longer…until the tide turns. We are, for just a moment, the very voice of God whispering to their hearts.

Over-achievers who are shown appreciation work even harder.
Under-achievers who are shown appreciation start to raise their game.
Friends who are encouraged are kinder.
Husbands and wives who show each other appreciation start to reciprocate.
Children who are shown appreciation start to “do” without being asked.
Team members who are encouraged try harder.
Bosses who are shown appreciation go to greater lengths.

“Sometimes our light goes out but is blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light.”
-Albert Schweitzer

So, that’s my challenge to you: rekindle someone else’s light today. A kind word, or my very favorite – the hand-written note, is all it takes. For no other reason than because it needs to be said, because it’s the right thing to do, because it’s life-giving. The woman who cleans the office restrooms needs to hear it. The guy at the gas station needs to hear it. Your friend needs to hear it. The daycare worker needs to hear it. And so does your child and your husband and your boss and your co-worker.

…And just imagine how the world might start to change.

Just imagine how the world might start to change if we all started to serve for absolutely no earthly thanks or reward and began to express thanks and appreciation like people’s very lives depended on it.

Question: Who will you encourage and show appreciation to today?

Waving the White Flag

If you know me well, or at least if you read my blog post from Dec. 31st last year, you know I’m not a big fan of New Year’s Eve. I haven’t actually figured out a good way to either explain or justify my disdain for the turn of the calendar except to say that I am just that sentimental. It doesn’t make sense, given that I am a really forward-looking, future-planning person. I’m complicated that way.

Yesterday I was telling my friend Lisa how my head was about to explode because I had spent the day being excessively introspective and analytical about 2009 and was trying to be much too detailed in my planning and laying down a strategy for success in 2010. Lisa laughed as she said she’s too laid back and doesn’t do that enough, and she suggested that she needed to learn more about that. But I actually think I have a lot to learn from her!

One of my goals for 2010 is to spend more time doing some things that I love and miss like being crafty. In searching for some clever ideas, I came across Stephanie Ackerman’s blog, http://www.homegrownhospitality.typepad.com/ . If you are a crafter, you’ll love it! Stephanie has a great idea: word of the year.

I want my word to be significant to the journey I anticipate in 2010 and significant to me as a person. Even better, I want it to be significant to my walk with Christ…A word that I’ll look at, think about, and study continually.

My word for 2010 is surrender.

If you’ve only thought about the secular meaning of it, and haven’t thought much about it in the context of The Kingdom of God, the word surrender can have a negative connotation. However, our surrendering is not only a demonstration of our faith, it also pleases God. It just happens to be really, really hard for us highly type-A chicks who like to take charge of everything and everyone! But in the Kingdom Context surrender doesn’t mean give UP and throw in the towel. In this case it means to give IN and follow Christ, trusting that He is fully in control.

God’s been teaching me a lot about surrender for what seems like years. Apparently I am in the remedial surrender course, & I don’t make the progress He’d like – still trying to control things myself- or I’d have this lesson down by now! But I realize this about myself, and am ready to take it on…I need to take it on.

Matthew 10:39: He that finds his life shall lose it: and he that loses his life for my sake shall find it.

I’ll have to contemplate the word surrender daily and meditate on it to remind myself that I am waving the white flag and allowing God to take total control.

So, I surrender 2009 and my fear of the unknown in 2010.
I surrender my need to do it all. (I believe God calls us to be excellent in all we do…so I’ll do less, but do it excellently and for Him.)
I surrender my need to control.
I surrender my angst about the car (post coming about this).
I surrender the 529, 403B, and all the others (2009 was not kind to our investments!).
I surrender trying to achieve balance.
I surrender school.
I surrender my business.
I surrender my time, my money, my talent.
I surrender my desire to serve where I see the need in order to follow Him where He connects me to the need that only He can see.
I surrender to following His nudges.
I surrender to Him…
I…surrender…

And so here I am, waving that white flag to signal the crossing of the finish line for 2009 and the ushering in of 2010, and I’m giving it all over to God. Every last bit. For when we are willing to become powerless in His name is the exact moment that we gain the ability to accomplish His goals, by His power, for His glory.

And that’s all I’ve ever wanted.

Question: What will your word for 2010 be? Why is that word significant to you?

When You Least Expect It

As my boys get older it is becoming harder and harder to make magical Christmas moments – the kind where they scream in delight, pixie dust and glitter is swirling, and time stands still.

This year we accomplished it – it just happened to be 2 weeks before Christmas! Last Sunday the boys were lounging around, trying to talk us into doing something fun. I was complaining about them watching too much football and embellishing a little about all I had to do that day. Then we asked if they’d like an early Christmas present…and what kid would say no to that?

But we did it! We pulled it off! They DID scream in delight - loudly! The pixie dust and glitter DID swirl! Time DID stand still, but just for a minute as the boys realized they were unwrapping tickets to that day’s Colts game! They sprinted upstairs to put on their Colt’s jerseys, we loaded up the car, and we hit the road!

The game was awesome, the experience all we’d hoped for, and the family bonding full-on.

The game ended and we left, having loved every minute of it.
That's when God showed up…

Let me set the scene: We are walking out of Lucas Oil Stadium with the rest of the 65,000 that were there – 65,000. It is chaotic. It is loud, really, really loud. Just outside the door you have to walk through a dark, echoing tunnel. In that tunnel are several guys playing drums, loudly. We are trying to talk about the game, not lose the boys, and hurry since it is cold. I can’t emphasize the noise & chaos enough.

I notice someone I know ahead of me to my left. I watch her. Then I turn my head to the right, make eye contact with the drumming guys and smile while thinking I should throw some money in the bucket by their feet.

Then I look straight ahead and stop dead in my tracks.

Straight in front of me and only a couple of feet from my face is a lady, older than I am. She looks me dead in the eye and here’s what happens next:
She says: Ma’am, do you have $25 so I can feed my kids?
I say: Yes, I do. I carry an envelope for this very purpose.
I lean in close and say: Tell me what you need.
She says: If I had $40 I could get enough food for the week.
I start to fumble in my messy purse, reaching for the envelope that I carry just for this very thing. It is so dark in the tunnel that I can barely see. My family is getting too far ahead of me…the tunnel is too loud – too many people rushing by us, yet time for this lady and me is irrelevant. I’m afraid I’m scaring her as I repeatedly yell to my family to “wait!”
Finally they stop, but are far ahead of me and really have no idea of what is going on.
She helps me hold my purse up so I can see.
I am completely calm and feel no fear.
I pull out a $50 bill.
Before handing it to her I ask: Do you know who this is from?
She answers: Jesus
I reply: Yes, it is and He wants you to know that He loves you.
I hand her the money and I start to cry.
She hugs me tight and says: Don’t cry. He blessed you so you could bless me. I love you.
I say: I love you, too, and I know you’ll be OK. I’ll be praying for you.
We part, I catch up with my family, and that was that.

A miracle right there in that tunnel.

She picked me out of 65,000 people because God nudged her that I was willing and prepared to meet her need. I responded because I was ready and am looking for those miracle encounters every single place I go.

You may think I’ve lost my mind. That’s OK with me.
You may think I'm looking for credit. I'm not. I share this with you, not for credit – for the only credit belongs to God. I share it to illustrate that God is alive and working and wants to do miraculous things at every turn, but we need to be willing to be his hands and feet. If you don’t believe me read, “You Were Born for This” by Bruce Wilkinson. It will change your life and the lives of those around you.

What’s funny is that I’d been hoping to be a miracle delivery agent for days, and every person whom I’d come across had caused me to question, “It is her?” “Is he the one?”, yet nothing - no nudges from God to act. And then on that day, when I was totally focused on my boys’ Christmas joy and pulling off that great Christmas surprise, God had an even bigger Christmas surprise in store for me.

I’ll never forget last Sunday’s events. It was a perfect day from start to finish – every last bit of it. God is crazy like that…just like we used to say in middle school, “When you least expect it...expect it!” It’s a craziness that is hard to explain, but I adore being part of it. My friend Philippe says, “It shouldn’t seem crazy…that’s just how The Kingdom works!” And Philippe is right!

So this Christmas I challenge you to embrace the craziness of an active, living Kingdom of God and be ready to be part of miracles wherever you go!

Question: Do you believe that God delivers miracles today and wants our help in making them happen?

Hold Tight

Christmas can bring out some intense emotions in people, ranging from the very best to the very worst. It can conjure up memories both dear and horrid, cause both elation and depression, and can make you see people in a whole new light. It can bring out the most giving, caring parts of our souls. And, as stated in Four Christmases (one of my favorite movies of all time), “You can’t spell families without lies”.

We see the very best demonstrated through people’s unselfish giving, through their coming together, through their thinking of others at this time of year unlike any other time.

We see their worst through fighting for deals, cutting other drivers off, stealing the closest parking places from little old ladies that have been waiting with their turn signals on for minutes by flooring it in before they even knew what happened! We see their worst through families bickering over time slots and visitation and who has to travel and even dredging up old hurts for revenge.

We see the extremes in those we know well and dearly love and in those we’ve never even met, but can observe or even feel the ripple effect.

On Thanksgiving I was talking to a family friend who was about to embark on her first-ever “Day After Thanksgiving Sale”. I listed for her the pros and cons and then told her about the first (and last) time I ever shopped on that day. I hate crowds, like sleep waaaay to much to be in the line outside of Target freezing at 4:30 a.m., and then fighting mean spirited people just to save a buck….cause nothin’ says the Birth of the Baby Jesus like being elbowed and trampled to save $20 on a PlayStation Game!!! No thanks!

Then I had to talk my own self off the ledge when I became seriously overwhelmed while trying to make my house look like it was about to be the subject of an HGTV Holiday Special. It was 8:00 on a Sunday night with a big soirée set to happen at my house in a few days. Lights for the tree from last year seemed to have lost their little twinkle…no problem…just run to Target.

But Behold! There were no lights in Target.

Off to Wal-Mart and getting irritated. Behold! No lights there either! Where’s the innkeeper when I need him? As I was scanning the aisle for white lights with a green cord (a combination that is apparently quite in demand yet unbeknownst to most retailers) another lady appeared who was looking for the same thing. I could tell she felt competitive about it, too, as I sensed her growing hostility. (Well, that and the lunges as she prepared to sprint…) I was tired. I was getting crabby. I could not fathom why the corporate buyers couldn’t understand my holiday needs.

I began the self talk: “I will not cry. I will not cry. Birth of the Baby Jesus. Birth of the Baby Jesus.”
Almost 2 hours later I was home finishing the tree, having spent about 3 hours, two trips to CVS, and laying down several more dollars than I should have needed to!

The soirée went off without a hitch and all the little details ended up being put in perspective where they belonged. What’s really funny is yesterday all of the lights on the tree just went out. All of them. I have no idea why…and get this: I don’t even care!

In the last two weeks I’ve had countless reminders about the important little things. I don’t even want anything for Christmas but to spend uninterrupted time with my family, snuggled up watching movies, talking, and having fun.

I just want to hold tight.

I want to remember how lucky I am that they are alive, that no one is in Iraq, that we are healthy, that while we could always have more, we sure have enough. I want to remember how lucky I am to live in this country, to worship freely, and to have opportunities. I want to remember how lucky I am to have someone to hold tight to.

And I want that for you.

This Christmas hold tight to those you love, feel blessed that you can, and let go of all the rest. Hold tight to the promise of that baby in the manger that was born and that died for you and me. And hold tight to the promise of a glorious eternity in Heaven.

Merry Christmas!

Question: What do you most want for Christmas? Why?